December 3, 2011

The Nativity of Saint Nicholas

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On the drive home from dinner tonight, in a not-so-desirable neighborhood, I saw something out of the corner of my eye.

It was past the kids' bedtime and they were both cranky and crying. They had a busy day. And yet...

"Jerry. Turn around."

"Why? No!"

"I'm not turning around."



"TURN THE FUCK AROUND. IT'S IMPORTANT."

~~Three minutes later~~

"Pull into that cafe. Drive casual."

"Why. Are. We. Here."

(from the backseat "waaaaaaa!!!" "can we go home?!")

"Jerry. That's baby Jesus in a fireplace. With a reindeer."

"What? No, that's a manger."

"Mangers don't have chimneys."

"Where are you going?! Those people are looking at you!"

"I'm taking a picture of their gorgeous decoration! What's the problem?"

"Oh my God."

Now, dear Reader, I share this with you. Sorry about the quality. I didn't want to be forced to squeal like a pig if I could avoid it.

I'm hoping it represents the birth of Santa, because the alternative - burning baby Jesus in effigy - is much more ominous. This may actually tie everything together! Christmas isn't pagan or Christian. Santa was born in a fireplace (where he now delivers gifts, hello!) under the adoring eye of Mary, Joseph, three wise men, and a reindeer. Cordoned off by a picket fence and some giant candy canes.

Or is this what they use for Festivus?     -Kim